Page 12A The Castlegar Sun TASTE TELLS MUSHROOMS 284 mi tins. MEXICAN MANGOES Tommy Atkin Variety. Size 12-14. 98 Limit 1. Over limit price 10.98 ea MARCH, 1993 WED [THURS | FRI_| SAT 24 | 25 [26 | 27 Adhertised prices in effect at your Lower Mainland Sakeway Stores . Quortity Rights reserved. Some iterns may not be axly © shown. Works out to prices are within «1 range Wednesday, March 24, 1993 FRESH CHICKEN LEGS 1.94/kg Cragmont. Assorted. 355 ml tins, plus deposit FACIAL TISSUE Truly Fine Box of 200 sheets. FRESH FRYING CHICKEN Grade A or Utility Limit 1 Bag. 2.18/kg lb : 4 PROFILE 24, 1993 Comfort THROUGH s winter's the resulting spring brings forth a fresh feeling of rebirth, renewal and revitaliza- tion. The feeling can be seen in the faces of children, who, relieved that winter's grip has loosened, race around the outdoors, thankful for warmer, and longer , ly members. After all, it is comforting not to have to cry alone.” he inabil- ity to face someone who has been diagnosed with a terminal illness is a societal problem; an inhibition borne pos- sibly out of guilt and even fear. Janet, who has been living at the Castlegar and Dis- days. Nowhere is spring more evident Janet, hospitalized due to liver cancer, than in the pussy wil- lows which bud annually. The small fuzzy buds offer comfort, and a promise that better times that are soon to come Just like the ones outdoors, the pussy willows which grace the night-table next to Janet's bed are a constant reminder that a new sea- son has arrived. Janet however, is hoping for her own new season iagnosed with liver cancer five years ago, the disease hasbeen one long battle. Silently, it continues to rob her of her strength—a little more each day. Janet, who is seventy, freely admits that she wants to die. She ‘says she accepted her fate after a failed chemotherapy treatment in February, and is now just plain worn out “Every night when I go to sleep, I hope that I don't wake up Does that sound bad to you?” she asks. Her fight, and admitted defeat to this disease, has made her real- ize that her life will now end at any time. “My body is prepared to go, but so is my mind—I can truly say that I am ready.” Janet's acceptance of eventual death does not necessarily mean she is not without some fear—she admits to not being overly reli- gious, and wonders what will happen after her last breath has been nm “Everyone has their own idea of what lays ahead; some say it's great, others are not sure. I do wonder if I'll see my husband though,” she says with a slight nod. “I guess it's really one big ques- tion mark.” - Janet has other fears and anxieties, which come and go as the days go by. But her acceptance of death, and willingness to talk about it has basically remained stable. She wonders if this is hard on her family, who spends much of their time visiting, talking, or just sitting thoughtfully. Janet says she draws a lot of comfort from this, and when her family cannot be with her, a local group of car- ing volunteers take their place. olunteers from the Castlegar and District Hospice Soci- ety ensure that Janet is never left alone—something she is thankful for, for her own reasons. The Hospice Vol- unteers, some of whom she has grown close to, will stay with her through all hours of the night and day if required. Their qualities are many, but Janet values the ability they have to listen to her —for as long as she wants to talk. "They really keep me going, and I know my family appreciates them as well.” Dolly Kaardal, a hospice volunteer who sits with Janet often, is one of 50 trained volunteers who carry a genuine interest and desire to help in providing emotional support to the terminally ill and their family and friends. Kaardal, like other volunteers, listens willingly care and 1 from F without giving advise, and provides a companionship that is con- stant until death. Even after the death of a loved one, volunteers offer a grief support group for family and friends. Geraldine, one of Janet's daughters, said she called the hospice society when the family realized they needed help. "We can't be with mom 24-hours a day, although we would sure like to be." Speaking on behalf of the family, Geraldine says they are draw- ing a lot of comfort from the Hospice Society, and would not want to be without the hospice volunteers at this emotional time in their lives. "Just when we thought we had nobody else to help us, they were there for us.” he word ‘Hospice’ is derived from an ancient term describing a place of shelter for weary. travelers on a difficult journey. Dying, for the most part, is per- ceived as-both weary and difficult for everyone involved, which is why Hospice workers are constantly dealing - with intense feelings. From shock and numbness, to feelings of denial and despair, volunteers are taught to recognize every symptom and reaction, and respond with the necessary comforts It's not an easy task by any means, and only a select strong few feel comfortable providing this aid “People often try to define what it is a Hospice volunteer has, that enables them to the work that they do—I would say that we have compassion,” said Anne Fomenoff, hospice volunteer coordi- nator. The organization was formed in Castlegar in November, 1985, and Fomenoff, who has been with the society since its inception, says the Hospice training, which takes place at Selkirk College in Castlegar, is something everyone should consider taking. “Everyone in the community should take hospice training. not so much to become a volunteer, but to better deal with this journey of life—which includes death.” Elaine Whitehead, another Hospice volunteer, can attest to both the benefits of using the Hospice Society for respite, which her fami- ly did when her father passed away, as well as the training, which she took later, after feeling compelled to join the society as a volun- teer. “Before, when someone I knew was terminally ill, or if some- one had died, I really didn't know what to say. And if I did say something, more often than not I would end up crying.” Whitehead admits that after taking the training she feels better equipped to handle the situation, and knows how to talk to dying Persons and their family members. “I still cry though, but at least now I know that this is acceptable, and even welcomed by the fami- Nurse Lori Enders and Hospice Volunteer Dolly Kaardal. trict Hospital since ‘ September, under- stands that it might be these very feelings which are keeping her past acquaintances from visiting. “My friends don't come as often as I thought they. would, but I guess it's because they don't know what to say to me.” ” It's very likely that, if Janet's close friends had Hospice training, they would not feel so uncomfortable and miss a chance to visit her bedside. n 1992 the Castlegar and District Hospice Society reaffirmed its c i to the cc y with the of a ‘family room’, which is located in the Castlegar hospital. The room, which is tastefully decorated in pink, green and blue pastels, contains not only a bed but a comfortable sitting area. The room is the result of many donations, some by local businesses and service clubs, and others by families who have used the room at the time of their loved one's death. A wall plaque, mounted outside of the ‘family room’, contains the names of all donors. The Hospice Society has also established a Grief Support Group, which meets the third Monday of each month. This groyp therapy session allows family members to speak openly about their fears and anxieties, and of course, their grief. Everyone is welcome to attend the meetings, since everyone grieves differently. “Children will run out and play, then cry, then play. Women will talk and cry, then talk and cry again. But men? They go out and build a bam,” said Fomenoff. Men tend to hold their grief deep inside, but it's still there. The Hospice Society, which has a contingent of mainly female volun- teers, is hoping that more men will become part of the organiza- tion—and one of the main reasons, is to help other mem: The Hospice Society is also starting a Kootenay Youth Bereave- ment Program, which will also offer therapy sessions on an open- door basis for young people grieving for a loved one Even for the Hospice volunteers themselves, a debriefing session is sometimes needed to relay their own feelings of anxiety and grief, which can often occur due to the length of time a volunteer will spend with a dying person, and the friendship that ensues. tiendship, and the quiet understanding that goes with it, is cherished by people like Janet. Each day, volunteers from the Hospice Society, along with her family, let her know that she matters. And she will matter until the last moment of her life. These people, her family and friends, are doing all they can to help her to live, until she dies “I really believe I'm close to realizing what everybody wonders about. I've had a happy life, a good life. But now, I'm ready to leave it.” FACT The Castlegar and District Hospice Society is a non-profit organization, located in the Castlegar Home Support office at 629 Columbia Avenue. Office hours are from Monday to Friday, 8:30 a.m. to 3 p.m.. For more information, contact them at 365-2148 The service they provide is free of charge. Story and photo by Sharlene Imhoff