Page 4B

"The Castlegar Sun

No need to manipulate

I have the gift. At least that's
what my partner in life tells me
He says I can get the better of
him any time, While I know he
hates that, he holds a certain level
of admiration for this ability.

I just thought I was extremely
stubborn. “Oh, you are,” he
assures me. But the gift is some.
thing not everygne possesses. It's
an art, otherwise known as

ulation. Not in any neg:
sense, you understand. I'm
beyond that now, and recognize
the tendency to use it in order to

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gel my own way.

Did you ever notice how many
people learn this art so skillfully
and at a very early age? Children
are experts at this game, and they
have to be, let's face it, we are
their caretakers and if they are to
get what they “think” they need,
they must motivate us emotional
ly. So, from the moment they are
born, their major role is to sur
yive, and they surely need us for
that. They watch us closely and
record every response we give
them, gathering data in order to
motivate us (manipulation).

How many of us have played
“pick up the toy” with the baby?
No matter how many times
he/she throws ‘it on to the floor,
we pick it up, don’t we? And if
we don't, the child starts to
scream. Well hey, if the child
really wanted that toy, they would
never give it up. No, they want to
control and manipulate us, ensur
ing we will hang around to ser
vice their every desire. It's a big

, test we parents have to endure

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Wednesday, September 16, 1992

and these children are no “dum-
mies” that's for sure.

Adults are similar in behavior
but slightly more subtle. Adults
have little children inside that
want attention, affection and yes,

Brenda

Hogstead
Lifeskills, for
the young, old
and willing

results in little stress

box
now).

“Well, do you just want to sit
in front of the TV all night?

“Not necessarily, what else did
you have in mind?” (He/she
didn't look at you this time).

“Well, nothing in particular,
I'd just like to do something
together.”

“Like what?” (By now your
are bordering furious.)

“Well, I just don’t want to sit
in front of the TV all night and

(You're really annoyed

love. And it really gets fun when
we adults try to hide it. Here's a
scenario I bet you can identify
with. You and your significant
other are “parked” in front of the
TV, (he or she just browsing
through the channels), and you
really are bored! You feel irritated
and ignored. So you ask “What
would you like to do tonight?” “T
don't know, what do you want to
do?”

“I don't know.”

Silence as your partner redi-
rects their attention to the “idiot

8
“OK there's obviously some-
thing you'd rather be doing, out
with it.” (This person is really
starting to get under your skin).
“OK how about just talking?
He/she turns around to face
you and says OK. What do you
want to talk about? Their posture

attempting to dump the responsi-
bility on their shoulders in the
first place. In all probability you
were needing attention and test
ing this individual by expecting
he/she to come up with the “intu-
itive answer”. If he/she really
loved you, they would have sug-
gested the “right” thing. After all,
they know how much you love to
go for walks

For heavens sake, why can't
you just come out and say it
Even though that would be at risk
of rejection. I mean, what hap-
pens if this person doesn't want
to do what you suggest? You then
are forced to make an intelligent
decision. Who to look after, they
or you? If you are true to your-
self, you'll go anyway but that
would mean facing the “pain” of
rejection. And the idiot box is

their yy e at this
interruption and you know this is
not going to be the conversation
you had in mind.
To explore this further, it’s
likely you had nothing at all in
mind and that’s why you were

s ly a threat to the relation-
ship.

But how many times do we
find ourselves “caving in” to our
partners in order to “be” with
them. Some call this co-depen-
dency. I call it human nature. We

as adults are still feeling the need
to caretake other in order to get
what we “think” we need or want
We are weak souls, aren't we

If we are really honest, about
it, we resent having to negotiate
in the first place

Remember the times when you
were just plain “grouchy”. It
didn’t matter what your partner
did, lookout! Yes, there's no
doubt about it, we've come into
our adulthood and never been
told that we actually can take care
of ourselves. Completely! Some-
how we still feel the need for
other people to behave in a cer-
tain way lest we feel slightly (or
more so) abandoned.

But who's doing the abandon-
ing? We abandon ourselves every
time we behave in a manner
“untrue” to ourselves and what's
in our hearts. Quite a sacrifice,
isn’t it

Just imagine what it would be
like if we had no need to manipu-
late ... A good deal of our stress
would disappear perhaps, don't
you agree?

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So you want to be a model?
Before you go running off to
Vancouver, Montreal or Toronto,
consider this: hard work, little

Modeling as a career,

If the agent likes your pic-
tures, he or she will likely intro-
duce you to the person who owns
the agency. Together, they will

sleep and a lot of let-di .

There is a specific and tough
Process to undergo before
becoming a model. First, you
locate an agency to meet an
agent. This person will size you
up, and if they don't see a dollar
sign over your head, he or she
will probably do one of two
things: refer you to another agen-
cy or alter your looks somehow.

Let's say the agent has
approved you. This person will
now tell you to get professional
Pictures taken and that will cost
anywhere between $500-$2,500
depending of course, on where
you go. The price includes the
make-up job and the hair style,
but you have to supply the
clothes.

Toit

of Fashion

Joan Andrade

look over your photographs and
decide which ones should be
used for your portfolio. They'll
chat with you, wanting to know
more about who you are, and
what your personality is like.
Now the work begins. It's excit-
ing but at the same time, quite
exhausting. Expect to get up very

early in the morning and work =

well in to the evening. Photo

means hard work and complete dedication

shoots, television commercials,
fashion shows, etc . . .It doesn't
seem like hard work, but it is.

The amount of time and pres-
sure means little chance to visit
with family and friends. The hec-
tic schedule results in an ‘early
to bed and early to rise’ routine
A typical day in the life of a pro-
fessional model follows this type
of itinerary

5 am. — alarm goes off

6:30 a.m. — first photo shoot

of the day

11:30 a.m. — fashion show

12:30 p.m. — fashion show

sionals working with your hair
and make-up to suit different
looks, which can change from
one photo shoot to the next.
Perks? Of course! You wear
designer fashions, travel to dif-
ferent locations and meet inter-
esting people

It took me seven years of hard
work and perseverance to get
where I am today. To any reader
out there who is considering
modeling as a career, I say go for
it, but be prepared to work very
hard. In any career, when you
work hard, you feel a real sense

1:15 p.m. — co ial

of acc

shoot

6:15 p.m. — supper

7:30 p.m.— bed time

And you have to do it again
tomorrow!

The schedule can be exhaust-
ing, but fun. It's an experience in
itself to have so many profes-

Joan Andrade has been a pro-
fessional model in Montreal and
Sherbrooke for eight years. She
has extensive experience in
organizing fashion shows and
Photo shoots and is hoping to
use this knowledge while living
in Castlegar.

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Tales of

The Salmo Library and Muse-
um are housed in the “Salmo
*, a building renovated
sistance of the Expo
Grant for community improve-
ment
The two organizations func-
tion independently but share
some space
The Salmo Arts Council and
the Salmo Chamber of Com-
merce also utilize space in the
building for meetings, to publish
the "Salmo Newsletter” month-
ly, and for the Chamber Man-
ager's office
The combined use of these
facilities has facilitated co-oper-

SUCCESS |

alive activities and has been
very good for the community
The Salmo Library has insti-

Bonny
Klovance
Salmo
Impressions

tuted an innovative program this
summer. With the help of recent
high school graduate, Amy Ror-
ick and Librarian June Stock-
dale, a summer reading progam
for children over five has been

Castlegar
& District

a)

HELP US REACH

n Salmo

started. Amy, hired on a Chal-
lenge ‘92 Provincial grant,
invites the children to partici-
pate in activities on Tuesdays at
2 p.m.

The program has an environ-
mental theme and to date the
children have studied fish,
learned to make vases using
recycled bottles and newspaper
Paper-mache, taken walks to
explore the environment and
read material on environmental
issues

On August 25, a wind-up
party at the park, which included
a treasure hunt, prizes and
wiener roast, was held. Amy
also assists on the front desk and
is updating the cataloguing of
the collection on the computer.

Wednesday, September 16, 1992

The Castlegar Sun

Occasionally, we will publish recipes from our “C ‘ooking With-
out Mom cookbook and this week our entire menu is from our
book. The emphasis.is on simplicity and quick preparation

BARBECUED PORK CHOPS
Temy : red hot coals in barbecue
Cooking Time: 15 minutes each side
Preperation Time: 15 minutes
Makes: 2 servings

INGREDIENTS:

2 pork chops

7 02. can tomato sauce
1/2 tsp. sugar

2 cloves garlic, crushed
1/8 tsp. salt

1/8 tsp. pepper

DIRECTIONS:

1. Wash meat under Tunning water before cooking

2. Mix all ingredients, except meat, in a flat dish.

3. Add Rock chops and cover with sauce. Let stand overnight if
possible. . .

4. When ready to barbecue, remove from sauce and cook for at
least 30 minutes, turning once or twice.

CHILLED BEAN SALAD
eparation Time: 10 minutes
Makes: 4 servings

INGREDIENTS:

2 - 14 oz. cans green beans

14 oz. can yellow beans

1 green or red pepper, chopped

10 cherry tomatoes or 2 tomatoes, chopped

DRESSING:

2 tbsp. vegetable oil

2 tbsp. water

2 tbsp. vinegar

1/2 tsp. dry mustard

1 tsp. basil leaves

1 tsp. parsley, chopped
1 clove garlic, crushed
1/2 tsp. dill

1/4 tsp. oregano

OPTIONAL: 1/4 tsp garlic powder instead of garlic clove.

DIRECTIONS:

1. Combine dressing ingredients and set aside.

2. Drain beans and combine with Pepper and tomato.

3. Pour dressing into bean mixture and combine gently.

4. Chill until serving time or overnight, stirring occasionally.

POTATO CUTLETS

Temp: medium - high

Cooking Time: 20 - 30 minutes
Preparation Time: 20 minutes
Makes: 5 servings

INGREDIENTS:

5 Potatoes, grated
2 onions, finely chopped

@ Ann Landers=—=

2 tbsp. oil
1/2 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. pepper

DIRECTIONS:

1. Mix together first four
ingredients.

2. Add salt and pepper.

3. Mix well and form into
patties

4. Fry in oil on both sides for
about 20 - 30 minutes or
until cooked thoroughly.

2 eggs, beaten
1 cup crushed crackers [ Cooking

THE HEN PARTY

NOTE: Serve with tomato
and cucumber salad or steamed vegetables

BROWN BETTY

Temp: 325 degrees

Cooking Time: 45 minutes
Preparation Time: 20 minutes
Make: 4 - 6 servings

INGREDIENTS:

1/4 cup sugar

1/4 tsp. cinnamon

1/2 tsp. lemon rind, grated

2 cups bread crumbs or graham crackers
3 cups sliced apples

1/4 cup butter

2 tbsp. lemon juice

1/2 cup cold water

OPTIONAL: Anyripe berries may be substituted for apples.

DIRECTIONS:

1. Preheat oven.

2. Peel and slice apples.

3. Mix sugar, cinnamon, lemon juice and rind

4. Melt butter and mix with crumbs

5. Butter an 8”x8” baking pan or a | quart casserole.

6. Put in one quarter of crumb mixture into bottom of pan, top

with one half of apples and sprinkle with half of the sugar

mixture.

7. Put another layer of crumbs, apple and sugar mixture and
sprinkle remaining crumbs on top.

8. Add water and bake, covered, for about 30 minutes.

9. When apples are soft, remove cover and brown the crumbs
(about 15 minutes). Serve with cream, ice cream, or lemon
sauce.

The Hen Party is a group of Castlegar friends who meet on a

regular basis and have many common interests inc luding cooking
If you have any questions or comments you can write to them C/O
The Castlegar Sun at 465 Columbia Avenue, Castlegar, B.C., VIN

1G8. Or reader can telephone 365-7729 and ask for Kathy.

Dear Ann Landers: I sent
you a poem five years ago. I was
only 13 then and so proud of
myself because you let me con-
tribute to your column. The rea-
son I sent it was because my
mother was a heavy smoker and
when I asked her to quit for my
sake she said, "I'll try but I
can't promise." When my poem
appeared in your column she
quit. I think it might help a lot of

WEEKLY _.
FALL BINGO

EARLY BIRD 6 PM - REGULAR 6:30 PM
EVERY THURSDAY
Starting Thursday, September 10

CASTLEGAR LEGION :

people who may not have seen it
when it ran in 1972 and perhaps
many who saw it may have for-
gotten it by now. So, Ann, please
run it again. It may be corny, but
it makes sense. Thank you. --
ABC

Dear ABC: Comy or not, it's
still good. I've taken off the
husks and here it is again
DID is a word of achievement
WON'T is a word of retreat
MIGHT is a word of bereavement
CAN'T is a word of defeat.
OUGHT is a word of duty.
TRY is a word of each hour.

© Sept.13 Happy 8th Birthday
Pamela - love Mom,

Monique & Sean

Happy 2nd Birthday
Desiree Therrien - from

© = Sept.17

HAPPY
BIR THDAY

@ Sepe. 16

© Sept. 20

Happy Birthday Daddy -
love Munchies

Happy Birthday

Janice Exdokimof - from
Mom, Dad, David,

SALVATION ARMY
Thrift Store and Family Services
NOW OPEN at

1100 - 3rd St., Castlegar (Downtown) 365-0212

9:00 am to 5 pm Tuesday - Saturday

We Need: Voharteers

Odds & Ends e

BRING IN OR CALL FOR PICKUP - 365-0212

PUBLIC MEETING

to share information regarding

PROPOSED R.C.M.P. BUILDING

; to be held

SEPTEMBER 17, 1992, 7 P.M.

CASTLEGAR & DISTRICT RECREATION COMPLEX

2101 6TH AVENUE

All interested members of the community are invited to attend
R.C.M.P. Building Committee

City of Castlegar, 460 Columbia Avenue
Castlegar, B.C. VIN1G7 Phone: 365-7227

(Show 10)

Schedule for Sept. 16, 17, 18 & 20

Wed. 6:30 pm, Thurs. 9:00 am, Sun. 6:30 pm
* FAITH ALIVE - A non-denominational Christian
programme.

Wed. 7:30 pm, Thurs. 10:00 am, Sun. 7:30 pm
* ROSSLAND GOLDEN CITY DAYS PARADE -
Coverage of this years event.

Wed. 8:30 pm, Thurs. 11:00 am, Sun. 8:30 pm
* KASLO JAZZ FESTIVAL (Part 3) - Featured: The Les
Quitzau Trio & "Fuego" a latin rythem band from Spokane.
Thurs. 8:30 pm, Fri. 11:30 am, (times approx.)
* CASTLEGAR CITY COUNCIL - Coverage of the
September 15th regular council meeting.

Na-tu-ral, in a state
provided by nature.

Mother Natures
a NT Ro}

Your Better Health Centre
716 Columbia Ave., downtown Castlegar © 365-7750

Natural Factors,
100% Natural Vitamin E.

LOCAL AGENIES
THE CASTLEGAR
& DISTRICT
UNITED WAY
SUPPORTS

* CASTLEGAR COMMUNITY
SERVICES

* WEST KOOTENAY
NATIONAL EXHIBITION
CENTRE

* KOOTENAY COLUMBIA
CHILD CARE SOCIETY

* KOOTENAY SOCIETY FOR
COMMUNITY LIVING

* RED CROSS

* C.N.I.B. (Canadian National
Institute for the Blind)

* ARTHRITIS SOCIETY

* B.C. CHILDREN'S
HOSPITAL

* WINS TRAIL (Women in
Need Society)

+ LIGHT & POWER
THEATRE COMPANY

WILL is a word of beauty.
CAN is a word of power.
Confidential to What Do They
Want From Me?: Just about the
same thing that most parents
want from their children.
Medicine was the first career
choice, teaching second, law
third, engineering fourth, and
politics LAST!

Mom, Dad, Patrick
& Brad

Danid, Baba & Deda

Happy Sth Birthday
Jennifer DaCosta - from
Mom, Dad & Sheldon

Happy 15th Birthday
Hailey Harfman - love
Toro, Peter, Ben, Jenny
& Ken

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Sept.9 Happy Birthday
Grandma heather Randen

- from Bradley & Kimmie

Happy Birthday
Sean Davidoff - love
Marcy & Ron

Happy Birthday
Keith Sherbinin - love
Grandma & Grandpa
Happy Birthday
Jennifer DaCosta - love
Baba & Deda

THIS WEEK'S WINNER IS INDICATED BY LOGO
Phone in your birthday wish & we will print It free of

charge. All birthday greetings must be phoned in
(365-5266) by Noon Thureday the week before the

SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 19

CASTLEGAR COMMUNITY COMPLEX
Don't miss our...

GIANT FLEA MARKET

9:00 a.m.-1 p.m.

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CANVAS BLITZ-SEPT. 22, 23

Castlegar & District
United Way

Deb Chmara, President
John Loo, Campaign Chair

FOR INFORMATION CALL Nona: 365-7331
Or By Mail - 1995 6th Ave., Castlegar B.C.

Sept. 16

Please Recycle
the Sun

psules

$24”

Sept. 10 @ Sept.17 Happy 9th Birthday
Kenny - love Mom, Dad
& Kristin

If your Birthday submission is not in

this weeks ad, look to next weeks.

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