= _ 4 SHIRLEY POSTNIKOFF Today I’ ‘m writing about. the joys of getting your driver's license; Not exactly an unknown subject but one that definitely needs men- tioning. This is written on the . understanding | that men make lousy. teachers, They have very. little patlenes when it comes to their precious vehicles. Any of you ladies who haven't got your ‘ licenses ‘should aware of, this, sThe day the wife ‘de- cidessthat' she is tired of “having her husband escort her,around, he is all for her learning how to drive. So you study your little yellow book until you know it inside out and: backwards, The. husband is very helpful and asks his wife the - questions at the back of the book. Half of which he couldn't answer himself. - When you go for your learner's test you are a nervous. wreck, but. your husband tells you'-a’ child could pass the test. He's very proud of you when you tell him you've passed the test. From this point on his’ attitude changes consider-- ably. The first few times you are behind the wheel, you aren't really driving. Instead you are taught how to turn the key on and off properly. Although you swear that its firmly implanted in’ your brain, he insists that you know how.to do it correctly. He then shows you where the brake is, and you prac- tice pumping it up and down until your leg is as muscular ‘as one of Joe Namath's. He then points out the rear view mirror as if you had never seen it before. After a half-hour's lecture on how to open and close the glove \ compartment door properly, you are ready for your driving debut. Un- fortunately your husband is exhausted and calls it a day. The following day, as _ dawn is breaking you are up with the birds: and are sitting in the car waiting to go. Your spouse arrives, less than enthusiastic, and in- stead of getting.in the Pas: senger's. door, . climbs beside you and tells you ‘uae he is: going ‘to’ show you proper, driving procedure. 2 Consider’ the morning’ stot, because it is spent ona tour of the town. Parking, stopping, signaling ‘and “he even goes so far.as to show you how the horn works, As- you drive back home you are told that it is lunch time. Finally you are allowed ‘ to drive, ‘and you are ‘so excited that you grind the key starting the car. This is only the beginning of many traumatic experiences for. the husband.” You don't know why. driveways are built to back. out of: now you can see why he was emphasizing the rear view mirror so much. He never said anything about. watching where you were going, only on how to adjust. it, So you are finally out of the driveway and proceed to motor along the highway. If he hadn't been yelling at you about the mangled garbage _ the nearest ‘ditch, .this time you handle the car “taught you’ to: drive , pro- can, you ‘wouldn't have: run over the family pet,.°: Why windshield wipers. are where the, signal lights are supposed ‘to ‘he’ you'll: ‘never know. You are so busy” trying to find the‘ switch to turn them off you. can’t. find the brakes, It ‘doesn’t help tohavea hysterical husband sitting opposite’'you ' and banging his foot on the floor boards in attempt’ to ‘stop « the car. Now he's gotten you so upset that you throw your hands‘ up: in ‘the: air help- lessly and the car veers into After: several days. of complete silence, your .hus- band quietly ‘suggests ‘that’. you. try, again. You can't believe your ears, © Of course, he means you: should try driving your son's toy Tonka truck | before attempting anything as com- Plleated as the family vehi- le. In about'a week you are allowed to drive again, and” like a pro. Your. spouse is* amazed and you are‘ too for that matter. The very next day your driving ability im- - proves and you are ready to take the driver's test. If your spouse had perly, he would: have: told you that you can't-turn left on-a red light. You would never have ran into’ the parking meter, and’ the driving instructor wouldn't be stuck under the front seat of the. car now.’ * Any : prospective driv- ers, scarred ‘off by .this article should just remem-' ber to have a woman teach them how to drive. —~---- FOU Mouthed._.- CASTLEGAR | ENTERTAINMENT Wanna By BOB TARPLETT (The writer. is: managing ‘director of West Kootenay Film + Productions.) ’ Passsst! Hey buddy, wanna buy. a. movie theatre?’ A more subtle version of this question will be asked in most, if not all, the major towns ‘and cities in Canada in the near< future. Odeon . Theatres / of Canada Ltd., that august chain of motion picture houses owned by Great Britain's J. “Arthur Rank Organization, has decided to call it quits and go home. Odeon will be selling 130 theatres for approximately $35. million to $40 million and there are five prospective custom- re lies Canadian, two in the ar federal Secretary of State Hon, J. Roberts has any - - say, Famous Players Theatres will be the only foreign-owned ° cinema © chain ‘operating in Canada. Under the present system, it is: very difficult, if: not im- cj possible, to. show a) Canadian production on the regular cir- cuits, because of the total |. foreign domination of distribu- tion and exhibition of feature films, through Canadian sub- sidiaries of the major U.S.~ studios, Meanwhile,” Canadian’ film: makers have. been making little money on commercials for tele- vision and an occasional feature film with help from thé Cana- dian Film Development Corpor- vation. _Even with — financial backing there is still the pro- blein of. distribution, although this has ./ Odéon theatre. chain. LWS 365-7155 2’ Come to New Concept. Hom and view this lous 24° x °\"The Service People’ 995 Highway #3 South, next to Tro! Buy a Theatre? This is why. thero is ‘such’ '' Oscar, was treated here in'the great interest in the news.of . West Kootenays, he would be the ‘Impending ‘sale’ of | the “screaming bloody murder. Fired |; We are ata cultural cross- ‘with the apparent success of. roads in terms of film and other, Bill. C-58 and the consequent screams of “Foul Play” by. the U.S. border. TV stations, as ' Canadian Films accessible to they lose Canadian advertising the general public or move the revenue, Canadian film-makers whole film industry south of the ‘are pushing for'a similar federal _ border and become absorbed in position on the’film'industry. the anti-culture of the U.S. Roberts appears to be in: Luckily we have some re- favor of a Canadian company. sponsible politicians in the ‘for the sale of Qdeon'Theatres, federal government and a more considering the amount of tax- | vocally aware arts community, payers’ money. ploughed into. who will bring public pressure the CFDC each year from the to bear’ when dealing with consolidated’ revenue fund. foreign groups. The young From 1975 to 1976 this sum was Canadians and recont immi- home this advantage to make. PEROT onid-aity art forms. We can either press rik 2 polaris i tas Ed pelts in the region. of some $3,5 grants are’ ‘more’ Million, an increasé of $400,000 minded and concerned with the ‘over the previous year. unique quality of Canadian life. It is quit di Let us give our people a ed fair chance—fair being the that the federal government * would require a greater return operative word here—to oath on its investment and hence Pete With Hollywood and if they make it easy for purchase by a boob, then so be it. But don’t Canadian” company, ‘on ifs -condemn them to eternal ‘this week that Canadian Cable service will. be.-enlarged. to penury,: selling pet food and sonditton thal, mare; caiaian soap powders without giving During the last year, we * Production. spent a hefty $200 million at the KRE M-TV. ‘ Jaws and King. Kong. The Canadian Guild of Film Makers per cent tax on net. box office Fort McMurray receipts for all films:and-using $80 million to invest in Cana- - dian Feature film production. inelude Fort McMurray, -Alta., well-known Canadian stars in Canadian films. Lorne Greene, ity to be shown on:the circuit. them a real chance at feature box office to see such films as Service Includes recommended ‘a modest 10-16: . the money, some $20:million' to ‘We would be able to see is in the ofl country 400 miles Star Trek's ‘William Shatner, north of Edmonton and ‘about “with the. of Canadian Territory. distributors. ; : Parakeet t Adoring Fans | Hold Onto Tickets ‘Kieu Nore Had Elvis. Presley lived, more than 120,000 people would have paid about $1.3 million to hear the over-weight superstar belt ‘out his famous songa during a 12-city tour that would ~ have concluded in Memphis. - But when the Bree: ‘Presley died of'a ‘heart attack -. on Aug. 16, one day before the. tour was to have begun, he left “more than a legacy behind him. Lawn Chair Bingo Sponsored by the Beaver Valley Lions Club andthe” Beaver Valley Recreation Commission. Friday, September 9 at 8:30 p.m. in the Beaver Valley Arena $1,950.in Cash Prizes Grand Prize: *1,000 Bring your own lawn chair. e * Buy your second card at half price; also * Play a special game for a patio set. 50. Each additional card: Admission tickets: tackle a problem ‘they rarely ‘encounter—what to do with.an * estimated $600,000 in tickets” 2 ‘adoring fans refuse to give up. ° Presley's :.will is to . be: handled in. the normal fashion is filed’ in‘ Memphis Probate” Court: probably 60 “days ‘after his, death. But the question of what to ‘do with « unreturned. ‘ticket “- . money. that hangs in a financial limbo will not likely be resolved After romoters and the-- ater owners take their cut for s jiavolved expenses,” the fate of COMMUNITY Bulletin Board bf WOMEN’S AGLOW MEETING The Wouen's ‘Aglow ‘Fellowship, will hold an: = evening meeting on | Wed., Sept. 14 at 7'p.m. in the‘! S Spokane’ will’ be the speaker. Phone 965-7830 or * 865-6443 for tickets. 5 BAHA'T ADMINISTRATION :: ; ESTABLISHING THE NEW WORLDORDER . Godfrey Nix, a Baha'i from Nottingham, England, will address the topic: “Baha'i Administration— - Establishing the New World Order” at a meeting on Mon., Sept. 12 in the basement suite at 215 - 7th Ave. N.-at.8 p.m. An informal social ,with. singing and. . refreshments will follow. Everyone-is welcome. For further information, phone 365-2472 or: 985-9289. 7 ce GENERAL HOCKEY MEETING ‘There will be a General Hockey Meeting on Sun... Sept. 11 at 7:30 p.m. in the Castlegar ‘Co: Complex. Everyone is welcome. PYTHIAN SISTERS MEETING aa The Pythian Sisters Kootenay Temple 437 will resume their regular meetings tonight, (Thurs., Sept. : 8) and Thurs. Sept. 22 in the Twin Rivers Hall, ~ Castlegar. The meetings will begin at 7:30 p.m. sharp. Coming events Castlegar and District‘ non- profit “-organizatio) are listed Canadian Ceilulose’s Interior Operations. Please submit - Castlegar ‘News by 5. p.m.: A-Public Senvice g {terior here through the'courtesy’o! Pulp” and. Lumber: ‘notices di 7 ‘Mondays. : Intenor Pulp and eratlons Canadian Cellulose te laws, -will ve” to. be decided si asked oe fans or charitable in-_ stitutions to donate the money <:to: “certain ‘worthy. causes— mostly, because Presley died of . “' a heart disorder, to local chap: ters of heart funds. But in order to donate the “money to charity, theater. of-:: . -fieials must, have the 'tickets— or some portion of them—back for accounting purposes, Many, hard-core Elvis fans won't give them back: They fear that if the ©: 5 tickets are .cut-in half; thei Some theater owners have ® "Chirp, Chirp, 223723" went: Peter: the parakeet, puzzling the“ British housewife. Who * , found the bid ‘ae exhausted Nettit 5 theater own: ‘pao. : ers, "and lawyers” must ‘now Finally she dalled 203723 and Peter was reunited with his -owner,. Muriel Hydes, who had taught him the phone number, “plus a few; naughty. words,” said the apes who was |. when an estimate of his worth : net, dentteg. Six. Ticket Holders Win $1 Million Six tickets worth $1 million each were drawn Monday in The Provincial lottery. draw. Winning numbers worth $1° million were 2055286, 1245650, 1027367, Aeeer, 2029261 and 193158: u "4 “ticket numbers Wi worth $260,000 were 2349781, » 2129645, 1470114, 2403761, 3182198 and 3863068. _ There was $10,805,000 in money fora total of 2. Ka jen Sugglitt, ful. films—Apprenticeship . of © films receive large amounts of ‘poor box office returns and ate . happened in’ one - well-known ‘and distribution. companies are |< -’ . going to make damned : sure Currently, the cable is John Vernon and Genevieve serving 20,000 homes in Fort Bujold would be able to return home and- receive ‘salaries ‘equivalent to amount TaelUAdc tha the states.,., Wehave had some. sacoese-! Spokane is currently carried in Eamonion, Calgary, and Leth- bridge, Alta., as well as most eastern British Columbia, com- munities. ‘The combined. Cana- dian’ cable systems.,.carrying -KREM-TV , will. now, deliver a ~~ total: of over 230,000, homes in : British Columbia: and ‘Alberta, REM-TV has. off-air and cable coverage in the United States of 459,500 homes in the Duddy Kravitz, Lies My Father Told Me, Man Who Skied Down Everest (which won an Oscar), vand Les. Ordres, which have international awards.. We hay: also liad:gome losers, but has, the U.S.0°0 0, Unfortunately made: advertising in ‘the papers and on television,’ whereas there is little or no marketing for Cana- KREM-TV. was advised « in mid-October. Fort McMurray 9: The Channel 2 signal from WINNER 7 ACADEMY AWARDS awn BEST PICTURE * BEST DIRECTOR aan +: -allit fakes i: litte Cantidené AUL /ROBERT.; esi i REDF ORD "SHE WAS YOUNG, SHE WAS DEAUTIFUL SHE WAS THE NEAT 150 miles south: of the Yukon « McMurray, bit officials expect Bia Double: ~ September 8, 9 & 10 four’ states“ of Idaho, Montana, and Oregon.” ARTHRITIS NEWS » dian productions. This is a deliberate pro- cedure taken by distributors to show that Canadian films have |. - and.:'see- advertised | - about: not’ worth funding. This has ‘special: food products for. arth- theatre three times in the last year and included the Canadian Academy Award winner. A big eastern . Canadian film producer said he thought ~ Don't: be; lured into treating that we should let one of the - yourself.:< : U.S. companies purchase Ode- Prerrerarrerarerwra rarer on on the pretext’ that one x would have access to the U.S: © Entertainment market. : How : naive-can you ? Eyrtt get? ‘The U.S. ' theatre ‘chains sellers. For you, ‘the arthritis * sufferer, it leads to false: hope News ‘and ‘Ads. that their own products have’ |: - Deadline top billing’ before any , other 9°: . : import has a’ chance. If he saw: : “3 p.m. Monda a _ th prated by. ned and 6) setreal inishing o your bing has eating. your. aries Oo for the zee anew, bation: rec room or any other. addition! Great prices was HEATING &. ELECTRICAL 616 Lakeside Drive : | [kentucky FRIED CHICKEN. i as. A great deal that you fead ritis is outright quackery. It is... fantastically ‘profitable for’ the. : and ‘wasting of your money." IE FOW TN wate Weta 1 jumbing, Heating, Electrical LOTS OF FREE PARKING Phone 352- ndiho or 352- 3701 Ann: What doi do wheniseea sexually precocious Boy of six embface and rub himself up against af '1-year-old girl, trying to satisfy his sexual curiosity? He was doing st in the yard where he eeu ht no one could see him. Should i mind my own business or e girl's parenta? ‘Lhnve a 84-year-old daughtor.and I would want to be told of > this kind of bi _ lor before it went any further. Please answer. i Mother In A Dilemma eh behavior, is not abnormal—howover, you should alert the Utele g girl's mothér’, also the boy's: Young children of the opposite sex ought not to be left to play unsupervised for long periods ‘of time, They should also be told'not to touch each otheg’s private parts, not because it's bad; but because bodies are persqnal property and not playthings. \\: i lost children manage to“play doctor” and experiment (this is norml curiosity), but they shduld be checked on periodically to maka sure they son become unduly preoccupied with such goings-on, { « ia . * * DearjAnn Landers: May I share with’ ‘you and your readers some feeliigs as our only ‘son prepares to leave for college? I'm sure tianyl mothers have had similar thoughts. started ‘writing this fn Junejand finished last. night: Thanks, Ann. } ‘Hold Fast The Summer Tt'isjthe beauty of the day and all it contains— The Tpughter and work and finally the sleep. The fulet— + > eptember, do not put your weight upon my mind.” know he: will t on of mine; who is now a man—he must go.” ‘will lace my thoughts with joyous years, ralls will echo his. “Hello”. Hs caring will be around each corner. ars. hb be tucked into our memory book. $ dook.to the beaut; of each a new wae ntly ‘give: thanks. ; Yend: You touched the hearts’ of millions today. ‘Thanks for our gift Of sensitivity. Fs * Dear ‘dn Randers: I'm’ sorry. you let the ES, beat you downs ie u Were.tight the first time: when you said, “Show me a husbabd. wh sale and Til « show, 6. who dk tes n'a fairly sizable ‘men's clothing-store and if it weren't for the wives, we couldn't sta; j.in business. About 70 per cent of our tosee! ugh the door because we know they are seriou Afmost always the wife makes her husband take'a second suit or a bjazer ora. pair of slacks. ‘And she’s the one who‘ does. the: selecting, which is a: good thing. Her taste is alwaya better than - his—of he doesn't care one way, or the other. ‘The beat-dressed men in this town are the ones whose wives bring ‘them in, They‘also seem to,have the best marriages. Thope at even if you don't want to. answer fe 1 HAVE JUFT ARRIVED) ue TS fee! & warmth ot Min ‘— made from deep, | rich acrylic. ‘Vinji'panels have real leather look. -- eColours: Champagne, Grey, eccecun & Belge pastels. :10==" 20." Many. styles. to}; Unsuccessful Night . . For Bungli ing Burglar Luckily, it wasn't * Ronald Johnson's night. After breaking Into: the apartment of an unidentified 28-year-old woman,’ in; Los Angeles, Johnson inexplicably fell asleep on the Moor. : Awakened by his snores, “the woman started to get out of bed, and stepped on his stom- ach, During the struggle that * followed, the woman screamed, waking a neighbor, who called to ask if‘anything was wrong, | “T'm fine, Mom,” the victim: said. The. neighbor, who was “not her mother, immediately called the police. Before . they could» get ‘there, the man ran out: of the apartment; but the police ‘ap- prehended: him the’ next. day when he’ returned to bis car, which was near the scene of the ! crime, He: had left: his driver's licence behind. I tee off on golf among Bill Smiley A GREAT many people luvk down their noses at the game of golf. Scornfully they ask: “‘How can an adult with a mind walk around a. few acres of manicured: pasture hitting a Hite white ball with along stock? And iam inclined to agree with them, It’s-a silly, game and at least once a-week I determine that I’m going ‘to quit. But ‘it’s just about as easy to quit golf'as it is to quit smoking. It’s a game that reduces “. strong men to tears. of im- potent rage and turns honest women into cheats who move their ball from a bad lie when. nobody is looking. Even the parlance of the game is ridiculous, com- bining «terms butcher shop (hook, slice, shank) with those from an aviary (birdie, . eagle) - and those from a horror movie (bogey, scull), It’s. an-expensive game. ., Membership in a club. can tun from $300 a year to $5,000" or. more. Even the basic equipment. can easily . ‘fun to $500 for clubs, cart, | > bag, shoes... ©. Those who don't belong to aclub can’ pay as you go,” eight or 10 dollars a round, ~. and add to that three $2 balls fost in the bush and a.coup! of drinks inthe club ‘house < and you're getting up around $20. for four -hours:. of ~ muttering ata little’ ball, - »~ pursuing a little - ball, and occasionally hitting that little ball:so sweetly that nothing can quite compare. with the. feeling, and you are hooked | * all over. again on this silliest of sports, Come ‘to ‘think of it, -golf isn'ta sport, any. more. than chess is. It’s more like'a way of life. And ‘there are a lot worse’ ways ‘of life: For a. teenager, once bitten: by- the bug, .it’s like a disease. But a & challenge: He knows per-. fectly well: that one’ of these ‘days, if the wind 3s right, his score down im tohis age. “SAM 80-year-old “:can’ still ‘golf’ and ‘enjoy ‘it, ‘but i} you:don't. see. too, many, of t's an: evil veiheard it-rumored at there}. is: sometimes 4 betting - involved, : especially. ~. sometimes’ staggering wagers J ofas much asa nickela hole. . And then, of course; it’s a, dangerous’ game, physically, *, emotionally. and,” psy- “ downswing, ey “stance, your gtip and.‘ the - kind of balls you'are using. For..:another, « they’re tough. They wouldn't. think of walking ‘to church in the tain, but they'll play 18 holes in. a torrent. On summer. days . when peop. are. dropping with’ heat. stroke, and on cold fall days, - F when people are huddled by. the fireplace, the golfers are out there, POT ROAS CASTLEGAR NEWS, Thursday, September 8, 1977, :: CHUCK STEAKS == OF Bi GRAIN FED . BEEF CANADA GRADE .. MATURE GRAINFED A BA 69 BEEF CANADA GRADE ....... wo Ue YOUNG TURKEYS:::.-. BUTT ROASTS sore ou 39 CHILL CON CARNE NALLEYS.'15 oz. TIN: {MILD CHEDDAR... READ. WHITE OR BROWN RYSTALS onance RISE-N-SHINE. Pkg. of 4-3% or. pot cm 59 9g FROZEN PEAS ;: FRASER VALE ARDMONA. 14 FL. Oz. GRAPE JUICE WELCHS: 24 FL.OZ. suelry. hacking and. i APPLE JUICE | sl | RIPE: BLUE ‘LABEL. 45 FL OZ. TIN: hewing around th Well, there you are. Th game is silly, expensive, evil, and dangerous, Golfers tun: the risk of being scarred for life in one.or more ways ant should be locked up for their’ own, safety. I’m “defi nitel going to quit. And yet’... And yet ... The other day. {had three ‘good’ a : ra have’ had.a. birdie if:1 shadn't hit the tree. Yesterday Iwas chipping ea Tthink one -more peal : PETTITT PHOTOS RATA