B4
_/Erma
Bombeck

It’s a myth in this country that anyone can make
garbage.

I'm not talking about the frozen/quick-serve/

kaged/just-add-water/th inute-In-the-micro -

CASTLEGAR NEWS, Moy 27, 1981

Pp i
wave garbage. I'm talking your made-from scratch-lef-
tover garbage for which North American women are
famous.

Garbage, If it's made right, takes a full week.
Most men don’t understand the process. They think
you can take-a leftover straight from the table, scrape
it right from the plate and dump it into the can, 2

ae is not the way North American garbage is
made,

For the pyresse of example, let us walk through a
week in the life of two lablespeons of leftovar peas and
a piece of leftover pot roast the size of a coaster.

Day 1: The leftover goes from the table to the
refrigerator In an elaborate ritual of joy. In an eager-
ness to display her frugality, the woman transfers the
peas and beef to a smaller dish with a haunting chant,
“Don't touch this. {‘m saving it for vegetable soup.”
Everyone believes her... or pretends they do. :

Day II: The leftover enjoys a place of prominence in
the refrigerator and Is seen every time the door opens.
A few times It is reexamined, but from the distance
comes the familiar chant, "Don’t touch, it. I’m saving it
for vegetable soup.”.

Day Ill: The leftover is moved to a less prominent
shelf and is fonally patted and d it willbe
the makings of vegetable soup.

Day IV: A traumatic time in the life of future gar-
bage, It is either tossed prematurely or is shoved to
rear of refrigerator on shelf next to a bowl containing
three tablespoons of peach juice and a pit.

Day V: Traditionally on the fifth day, a leftover is
opened, exposed to oir and passed around to see if

anyone can identify it. If it is recognizable, it is shoved -

in dark corner and allowed to “ripen” for another day.

Day Vi: This is a crucial day in which the peas and
beef’curdle, turn green, harden and grow fuzz.

Day Vil: Excited cries resound through the kithcen
as the children dance around the refrigerator chanting,
"Is it garbage yet?” Mother removes the leftovers,
folds back the foil and pronounces the peas and beef
dead. In no other country in the world do women
prepare their garbage for burial like they do here. Fir-
st, they wrap it in newspaper, then put it In a brown
bag, then a plastic one and finally put it to rest in the
garbage can in the garage.

A time-honored tradition of American women who
for years have vowed, "! will bury no garbage before
its time,

Time-change dile

LIFE IS often confusing,

Trip to see relatives
-was like a bad dream

PRINCE GEORGE (CP) —
Robin and Darrell Jomha
were introduced to the Mid-
dle East conflict as soon as
they stepped off an airplane
at the Beirut airport. .

Jet fighters thundered
overhead, shots could be
heard in the distance and sol-
diers and equipment lined
the roads to their grand-
parents’ home in Lebanon's
Bekaa Valley.

Robin, 18, and Darrell, 10
left Prince George in‘ April
with their fahter, Rick, to
visit relatives. Along the
route to the grandparents’
home they were stopped at
military checkpoints almost
every 15 kilometres.

“That was the first time we
got scared,” Darrell recalled.
“We had to take the back
roads, because there was
fighting in Beirut (between
Christian and Moslem Leban-
ese).

“They've been’ so busy
fighting each other they
haven't time to fix the pot-
holes,” Robin said,

Robin said the trip to Lala,
a village of about 2,000
people was tiring.

“I was so tired that the
military people, the tanks
and the trucks we saw along
the road and at checkpoints
seemed more like a dream. I
knew they were real, but it
was kind of dreamy. too.”

STAYS AT HOME

The boys said the first two
weeks of their visit were
peaceful — almost boring —
because they stayed in the
village.

“We weren't allowed to
travel the country because

occasionally amusing. If you
can’t cope with the confusion
and enjoy the amusement,
you're in bad shape.

A couple of weeks ago,

when we had to change the
clocks, 1 managed to confuse
and amuse myself at the
same time.

On the Sunday night, I
dutifully moved the clocks a-
head an hour, following that
old aphorism about changing
from Daylight to Standard
and vice versa. I’ll give it to
my faithful readers, especi-
ally those who turn the hands
in the wrong direction and
arrive at. church an hour
early or at work an hour late,

Itis: “Spring forward; fall
back.”

Well, that’s what I did, At
least I thought I did. On the
Sunday night, I set my alarm

clock an hour ahead, and was”

on time for work, with my
usual for seconds to spare.

But the next night, Mon-
day, got confusing. 1 fell
asleep after dinner, as us
seniles so often do. I woke
up. My wife had gone to bed,
probably in disgust. I check-
ed the clocks in the house.

First call was my alarm
clock. It had stopped at
twelve noon, and it was pitch
dark outside, so I knew that
was wrong. I don’t have a
watch, so I couldn’t check
that.

Then I checked the two
electric clocks, one up, one
downstairs. They were the
same. A horrible suspicion
lurked in my mind. Had I
teally moved those two a-
head on Sunday night? Had
my wife expected me to do it,
and not done’ it herself,
which she should have done?

I could have wakened her
and asked her. She also has a
watch. Does one waken a
sleeping crocodile,

T decided to use that great
gift of manking - reason. I
switched on the TV set, and
there was Knowlton Nash
blatting away about some-
thing or other. Mr. Nash, as
you may remember, delivers
the CBC News every night at
eleven. Except in New-
foundland,

Bang on. Reason had once
more prevailed over panic. 1

Bill Smiley

proud of my logic, I set all
the clocks for 11.15 p.m.,
which seemed safe, and went
to bed.

When my alarm went off,
it seemed rather dark out.

Had my breakfast; read
the paper. But something
seemed strange and out of
kilter. Checked my neigh-
bours. No lights showing,
and they’re early ‘risers.
Checked the street outside.
No cars streaming by, no
reluctant students plodding
off to school.

Began: to have a horrible
inkling, whatever an inkling

is.

When it was 8.30 by my
clocks, I decided to make a
move. Put out the garbage.
Not another garbage-putter-

- out in sight. Got out the car

and drove to work. Nobody
in sight. Either | was an hour

late for work, or an hour
early, .

I’m just terrified of losing
my job, as you can imagine,
so finally I arrived at the
schoo]. Three cars there, in-
stead of 300. The night
watchman fet me in. It was
five minutes to eight in the
am.

It was only then that I
realized my inkling had been
bang on. I had put myself on
double-Daylight time. All the
clocks were two hours ahead
of what they’d been last Sun-
day. .

It wasn’t so bad. Now I
know what freaks those
people are who get up early
and get to work half an hour
ahead of time. My assistant
department head walked in at
8.30 and fainted dead away
when she saw me sitting
there, perfectly groomed,

we could have been shot at,”
Darrell said.

Soon after they saw a
fighter plane shot down by
anti-aircraft guns nearby. A
week later, Robin was awak-
ened by the sound of anti-
aircraft guns shooting at a
spy plane.

“That one scared us be-
cause we saw the plane on
fire," he said. The boys were
to be home by May 10, but
the Beirut airport was closed
in what was to become the
longest closure of the con-
Dict, 22 days.

Robin spent his birthday in
Lala May 13 while: his
mother, Esther Soles, was
getting worried in Prince
George.

The boys and father were
planning alternatives — cross
the border to Syria and fly

“home from Damascus or take

a boat to Cyprus and fly from
there.

However, the Beirut air-
port reopened a day before
they were going to leave for
Cyprus, and they arrived in
B.C. Thursay.

Are You A
Sweater Girl?

Then you may be won-
dering how to get rid of
those sweater “‘pills” that
make’ your favorite top
look old and frumpy. Just
shave them off with a
straight-edge razor for a .
like-new look.

Beta Sigma Phi members
mark 50th anniversary

April 80th was a special
day for members of Beta
Sigma Phi all over the
world.

It was the 60th anni-
versary of the sorority which
was founded in Abilene,
Kansas in 1931.

Castlegar chapters, Alpha
Phi and Xi Gamma Rho,
along with three chapters
from Trail, Theta, Xi Lam-
bda, and Omicron, gathered
at the Fireside Place for a
banquet and night of cer-
emonies.

‘wo new members, Val-
arie Hahn and Pat Luker,
pledged by Xi Gamma Rho,
received pins and yellow
roses in a ritual ceremony
welcoming them into Beta

Marriage ceremony nixed
due toto improper attire

VICTORIA (CP) — If you
want to get married on a
wind-swept mountain, a ferry
steaming across the Gulf of
Georgia or aboard a plane
cruising at 10,000 metres,
someone in British Columbia
probably will make it legal.

. But try it dressed as tel-
evision’s Miss Piggy and
Kermit the Frog and you
could have trouble. e

One couple tried it last
year and when the marriage
commissioner refused, they
complained to Karl Fried-
mann, B.C.’s ombudsman.

But Friedman backed the

mma

chafing to get started, in-
deed, already gawning a bit.

By 4 p.m. the ass of my
pants was dragging on the
ground, I could have used a
cane, -there was a special
meeting I couldn’t avoid, and
they carried me out to an am-
bulance at 5.30.

My wife was all out of
kilter, because she, too, had
been on super-Daylight Sav-
ing Time. She’d had lunch at
11 am., dinner at 5 p.m.,

, wondering where I’d got to,

and was ready for evening
snack at 7 p.m.

The.only thing that really
distrutied me was that some-
one, iri the general confu-
sion, realized it was Column
Day. They had to give my
amphetamines to wake me
up, hoist me into a chair with
a block and tackle to write
this, prop my, eyelids open
whith broken toothpicks,
and then give me the Great
News,

And I’m going to strangle
Knowlton Nash for appear-
ing ona 10 p.m. show.

Last Call

TRAIL & AREA

commissioner who refused to
go through the ritual with

commissioner had not acted
improperly in refusing to
ize the

the ly-attired couple.
The ombudsman said.in his
second report to the legis-
Jature that a marriage com-
missioner refused because ‘he
felt he could not solemnize
the occasion. is

‘] concluded the marriage

andI
advised the betrothed to seek
out another marriage com-

missioner in the vicinity who

might have less conventional
views of what is solemn, or a
clergyman who might be

Sigma Phi. A second ritual
: was performed to honor Joan
Demchuk with the “Order of
the Rose” which is earned
after 15 years of active
membership.

As the 50th Founders’ Day
banquet continued, 10 wom-
en were welcomed into the
"Silver Circle.” The 10 ‘mem-
bers, who have belonged to
Beta Sigma Phi for 25 years,
are Jessie Booth, Beryl Cole-
man, Carol Couch, Allison
Hanson, Irma Kerr, Olive
McPhee, Mary Reeves, Elsie
Sheedy, Vivian Swanson and
Bea Young.

A final “Ritual of Jewels”
was performed for those
women who had just com-
pleted their first full year in
Beta Sigma Phi. The mem-
bers who received jewelled
pins and ‘yellow roses were
Marilyn Dahlen, Joanne Fur:
lotte, Lana Rodlie, Marlene
Wiggin, Marriana’ Sharp,
Karen Craven, Linda King,
Marie Phillips, Suzanne Pol-
ovnikoff and Lil Whitley.

The evening’s program
was highlighted when the
Alpha Phi Chapter of Castle-
gar introduced Mrs. Lucy
Ellen Eaton as an Honorary
Member of Beta Sigma Phi.
Along with her. honorary

ship, Mrs. Baton was

willing to ize the mar-
riage,” he said.

presented the “Lady of the

Year” award in recognition of
her poetry for which she has
become well known locally
and around the world. Mrs.
Eaton read aloud: a poem
which she had written espec-

fally for the occasion entitled :

“Vision.”

Vision
Vested with a talent
I must involve myself with
Someone who can benefit
IN some way from knowing
* me;
One who may. have
Need of my talents’ ministry,

LUCY EATON’
...« lady of the year

for

mines, anew B.
new port faci

Facts about northeast coal. One of aseries.

Japan.
to pay us

record prices...

for coal

The coal sales agreements
@ negotiated by Teck Corpora-

tion and Denison Mines with

Japanese buyers provide for
. the highest prices ever paid
coal under long-term contracts. The two companies
have contracted to sell about 100.million tonnes of metal-
lurgical coal from northeastern British Columbia to Japan
over a 15-year period.
The development will involve construction of two
C. Rail branch line, a townsite, highway, a
ity at Prince Rupert, and upgrading of the
- existing rail lines to transport coal from the area to the new

port. 8

- The widely-quoted northeast coal price of $75 Cana-
dian per tonne is the price-effective on April 1, 1980—but
several. components of that price steadily increase from
that date. The price as of April this year is approximately
$80.50 a tonne and by 1984, the first full year of northeast
coal production, the price willbe atornear$100atonne. In
addition to these increases, the sales contracts provide for
periodic price reviews once production begins.
In comparison, high-quality coal from southeastern
British Columbia is being sold to Japan today for about
$67 per tonne. Coal producers in Australia:are supplying
the same type of coal to Japan for about $77.50 Canadian’
per tonne. : : 7
The prices we negotiated in tough bargaining with the
Japanese represent top. dollars for northeast coal. Our
Japanese. customers want security of supply. The prices
they are paying include direct transportation charges and
royalties and will generate taxes that, combined, more

Student mechanics

4

offer free inspection

Free vehicle. inspections
will .be. available, to Nelson
and area residents May 28, 29
and 30 at the Chahko-Mika
Mall, courtesy of the auto-
motive students from the vo-

cational division of Selkirk’

College. :
Tho inspection clinics will
take place in front of Woolco
from 1 to 5 p.m. Thursday
and Friday, and from 10 a.m.
to 8 p.m. on Saturday. '
Students will carry out a

general inspection that will

cover exhaust systems, align-
ment, front-end and brakes.

Underhood . items such; as -

fluids, filters and emission
control ‘equipment. will be
checked. A_ scope. analysis
will also be conducted.
Motorists will receive a
complete report on the con-
dition of their vehicles in

. both inspection areas.

Customers will be handled
on a first-come, first-served
basis, with each inspection
expected to take about 30
minutes to complete. i

The college's mobile train-
ing unit and some pieces of

from the

* parking lot. .
Inside the” mall, several
other vocational division de-
partments will have displays.
’The-millwright department
will display hydraulle traln-
- Ing units, and tho electrical
‘department will show train-
ing’ units’ including the resi-
dential electric heat simu-
lator, the commerical heating
system simulator and. the
heat pymp simulator.
Other displays will feature
hairdressing, office admin-

trainin,
heavy duty mechanics pro-
gram will be on display in the

and
practical nursing at the v:
cational division. .

f

Foresees future gold ru

VANCOUVER (CP) — The
world’s supply of gold could
fit in the hold of'a super:
tanker, yet for nearly 6,000
years the bright yellow,.mal-
leable metal has protected
individuals’ assets | against
the financial ravages of war,

Af famine

in the world, says people will
eventually lose confidence in
the value of paper money and
revert to a gold-backed cur-
rency,

He said rising inflation
rates will encourage many
Canadians to buy’ gold asa

riots,
‘and natural disasters. ;
‘Bince. the time ancient
Egyptians used it for jewelry
and the classical Greeks
founded their monetary sys-
tem on it, gold has formed a
snug, lustrqus hedge against
inflation, high interest rates,
curréncy devaluation and de-
pression.

Otto Rosthenmund, presi- ;

“dent of Deak-Perera, the

Service.conelt

de

for Glade pioneer .

Service was held Monday
from the Castlegar Funeral
Chapel and Tuesday from the
Glade Russian Hall for Nic-
olas N. Wasilenkoff of Glade,
77, a resident of this area for
almost 70 years.

Born June. 28, 1908, in

Langham, Sask., Mr. Wasil- -

enkoff worked as a logger,
mill worker and carpenter all
‘his life.

In 1992-he” managed: the -

Glade. Community Store.

Mr. Wasilenkoff was ‘a
member of the Union of
Spiritual Communities of
Christ. He is survived by his

wife, Annie, of: Glade; -two
sons, Alex and John, both of

EDMONTON (CP) —
Members of Little Peaple of
Canada have held their first”

two
Mrs. Sid (Nellie) Shukin of
Nelson and Mrs, George
(Lucy) Sherstobitoff of Kel-
owna; 10 grandchildren; and
two sisters, Mary Legebokoff
and Anne Janzen, both of
Glade.

He was predeceased by his
parents, Martha in 1978, Nick
in 1979, and sister Polly_
Koftinoff:in 1954, ae

Burial was at Glade Cem-
etery with funeral arrange-
ments under the direction of -
Castlegar Funeral Chapel.

national in Ed-
monton, in an effort to gain a
higher profile.

The group's, president, .
Karen Renner, said the or-
ganization, which has '
members, accepts people
to 4-foot-10.) 8.

Renner .. said . her_- small:
stature helps in her work as a -

“kindergarten, teacher. “The
kids think my height is great.
Having eye to eye contact
an advantage.” Sha

But it can lead to unusual

. problems, such as falling into.
a freezer when sheleans in to
pick up food.

largest. gold retail company’

against the erod-
ing allay, just as worries
about the economy ted
nen to buy gold in 1979 i
Increased buying during
the “gold rushes” of the last
two years pushed the price of
gold to a record $850 U.S, an
ounce in early 1980 from $100
in 1971. The price of gold how

rests at about $480 an ounce, :

“I can foresee more and

more rushes in the future,”

offers

sald Roethenmund,

“Right now is a very. good
time to ,start’ accumulating
gold. Inflation’ will continue
and’ as it: continues, ‘gold
prices will climb. We will see
it at’ $1,000 ‘and $2,000 (an
ounce) and higher"; . --

HAS WARNING

But, he’ warned that the
average. small” investor
makes a mistake buying gold

juring a rush or as a short-
term investment. 0)"

“Gold is not a speculative

investment. It's a long-term,

not a short-term invest: .

ment.”. : Sane
Interest. rates will : also
continue to climb in the years
to come, Roethenmund: said.
“I'm afraid to

~ PATIO VINYL TURF :
: . . 37? 99 “a yd. |

SUPER-SPECIAL

redict, but. we

ChinaCreek

we have not reached the top
(of the interést rate: levels).

We will see a prime rate —
the lending interest rate set’ -.s¢

by chartered banks for their
best customers — of 30 per
eent,and higher,” “ E

However, Reethenmund
sald high interest rates keep
the price of gold down, be-
cause. current high’ rates of

about 26 per’ cent offer’ in-.

vestors a sure way of earning
a good return: on’ their in-
vestments. -

During the “gold rush” of a:

Pope’ would’ have | bumped
ld prices up at least $50,

-Roethenmund ' said.’ But,

when the Pope was shot last
nothing.

gaificant

-. CASTLEGAR NEWS; May 27, 1981

Gold company executive

“He said once the price fallg

ber two producer,
uy” gold :t

peices,

below $450, South. Africa
year ago, the shooting of the ..w 160 per ce!

the ni

un,
‘begins.to
: ullion’

7.100% Nylon. t

| LIVING ROOM SAXONY .

4 Colors... . i
: Reduced from $34.95

“RUBBER-BACK MLO Ma
~ REC ROOM TTES

100% Nylon Fat Back

"KITCHEN
INETTES

piece. All wood... :

CHESTERFIELD PUM Cth nc.
SUITES [aT

Choose from a huge selection.
Geta staggering Price Break.

DON ‘“T: — FOR GOODNESS
> SAKE — DON’T MISS
- ON THIS OFFER!

100% NYLON

- Was $244.95 sq.yd. NOW
“ Auge Selection’
Variety of Styles
-AT-SPECIAL MANAGER ’S.
=. S PRICE BREAK

60 DINING
ROOM SUITES

“BIG VARIETY.
OF STYLES & PRICES

‘DECORATOR |
“LAMPS
: . ATSLIGHTLY OVER OUR COST
‘Help yourself to °a. Super ae AONE NBER St
“Special. Ask. for Manager's BUY NOW.
-Price Break. : : ; . : .

= =
White Pages now closing.
This is it. The White Pages, that's the alphabetical section of
your new directory, is now closing, °
The Yellow Pages has already closed.
Now’s your last chance to check or change your listings.
R names and add! can change in a year and so

When it comes to moving .-
goods, Pacific Western Air
Cargo goes the distance,
whatever the distance. And
our rates are cheaper than
you might think.

In fact, it’s cheaper and
faster to make frequent

- deliveries by Air Cargo than
to store your goods while

waiting for the next land.
shipment to leave. And you .
will reduce downtime. with
Pacific Western's reliable
service.throughout the West
and beyond. | :

When you've got to get
something somewhere, send
it by air with Pacific Westem. ~"
Air Cargo. , Sane

knew it was between 11 p.m.
and 11.20, when they seem to
run out of news.

Easy in my mind, rather

than cover the costs of the road, rail and port systems that

will provide widespread benefits for all of British

Columbia. : : : ,
- For further information, please‘write: . .

“HOMEGOODS

- CHINA CREEK

The

PINE BASKET
HOUSE
Gift Shop

should the listings.
Want to list other family members? Now's the time.
_. Ofcourse businesses you represent as well as names and
positions of key employees can also be added now.
But hurry. Charges apply for changes and extra listings.
Call your B.C. Tel Business office and beat the deadline.
The White Pages. Make sure we've got it right.

BOTH @)

DENISON MINES LIMITED one of
Coal Division :
650 West Georgia Street

Vancouver, B.C. V6B4N7

TECK CORPORATION
1199 West Hastings Street
Vancouver, B.C, V6E 2KS

Many hand-made Building. jobs and prosperity for British Columbians
is —for today and tomorrow.

4m. from
Patterson Border, U.S.

The Great Cargo Cc